Since I’ve been a sex worker for the past 14 years, I’ve had a stable partner for the last 4 years. But in those other 10 years, I’ve fallen in love several times, and just like I fell in love, I also broke up. I’ve learned to deal with it like that.
Partners can’t handle my job as a sex worker. At first, it isn’t talked about, and it seems like it’s accepted, but in the end, the relationship fades away.
I don’t want to leave my job; it’s my passion. Especially now that I’m turning it into something more professional, teaching good sex to anyone who needs it. The world needs to learn how to have sex, and people like me are necessary.
I don’t want to be boxed in as an escort for men. I want to approach sexuality more professionally and focus more on women and couples. That’s why I’ve trained as a sex coach. I want to market myself on other types of sites, not just escort pages.
And I don’t want love to come along and throw me off course; I want everything I’ve built to continue. I’ve invested so much in my life for nothing.
I don’t want my 14 years of experience in sexuality to go up in smoke. No, I don’t want that. Because then you break up or they leave you, and starting over is tough. And when you start over, it gets more complicated the older you get.
But my relationships think that one day I’ll quit. And it doesn’t matter if you’re amazing, almost perfect, and love your job; they won’t accept it.
A woman who lives by sex isn’t fully accepted in the emotional world. What will the family think? What will friends think? What will they say? Always worried about what others think instead of focusing on yourself. That shame.
What’s so wrong with having sex with other people? When will we stop seeing it as an abnormal job? It’s a necessary job, and people need to teach it. And that’s it, sex. We keep confusing sex with feelings and love that are light-years apart.
What I do is similar to what many men do, but I’m upfront about it—I just get paid for it. I charge for sex while others pay, but the act is the same. Who cares about the position?
From a work perspective, handling a client is just like when I worked at an insurance company, making a phone appointment and then visiting them. Now, instead of selling a policy, I’m selling sex. Yeah, it sounds super different, but honestly, it’s not that different from me. It’s light-years until people can see it that way.
So I have to hide it from my partner and their circle—friends, family. Which goes against my principles.
What they don’t know is that eventually, everyone will find out except him. It’s like what happens to most escorts who hide their profession; most of their close ones find out, and they keep pretending the obvious isn’t there.
I’m all about being upfront with the truth. Like it or not.
But if I want to stay with this person, I have to respect that and hide it from their family and friends.
My philosophy is polygamous relationships and a child-free life.
Who will sway whom? Polyamory or monogamy? Open relationship or closed one?
I don’t want to change that evolution and how we view sex and relationships. Nope, I’m not looking to do that.
It’s true that when you share your life with someone else, projects and perspectives can change, no matter how much you wish they wouldn’t—but not to the point of abandoning it 100%. That would be going against my principles.
What changes when I’m with someone is that I’m not available 12 hours a day, Monday through Sunday, almost 365 days a year. I share my life with another person, and I need to dedicate time to them too. That’s where I see my effort and commitment to the relationship; I organize my time based on theirs, but that’s not seen or appreciated.
Right now, I’m with someone, but I don’t know if we’re friends or partners. Government protocols made us marry in the first year, so now we have that bond uniting us. We’re husband and wife. Sometimes we live together, sometimes apart, and what works best for us is having our own houses and getting together to enjoy good moments and help each other out.
I’m in a relationship that started beautifully in Paris, a connection I needed for a long time, especially back then. I craved love, attention, and someone who would give me their time when I needed it.
For now, I’m still doing my professional activities, which were hard for me, getting to know someone while staying true to myself.
I try to stick to my polyamorous principles, but it’s tricky. When you live together, it’s almost impossible; society, family, and mentalities aren’t ready for those kinds of relationships, and we lose ourselves quickly.
I want to keep falling in love with other people and stay in love with the old flames without hurting anyone.
I love falling in love and falling out of it, with all that it brings. It sucks a lot of the time. You get the so-called heartache. Some days or months suck! But, trust me, with every heartbreak, I’m getting quicker at forgetting and moving on. I’ve become an expert. The trick is to take a trip longer than three weeks.
Life Sex Coach
I see this relationship as my project as a life sex coach.
It’s teaching me how to handle situations and gain new perspectives on partnerships, allowing me to practice my views on relationships.
A 51-year-old liberal woman with a 34-year-old Muslim man.
If he becomes agnostic and liberal, that’ll show the world can change. Sounds tough (but not impossible). Changing the world isn’t easy; too much manipulation exists around beliefs and cultures.
Let’s see what the future holds. Will I stay in this relationship? Will I have other connections? I have some interested folks, but honestly, I’m currently more interested in forming connections with women, and if they work in my field, even better!
I’d love to experience falling in love with a woman who shares the same passion—positive sexuality.
That’s my wish!
